Virgil Winston: Marketing Guru

Besides humans, the only animal that can stand on its head is the elephant. And what does this have to do with your next marketing promotion? Absolutely nothing, except that it makes me wonder just how many animals did they have to go through to find one who could do the trick? While odd, it’s not as strange as the scientist who conclusively proved that if you were to pass gas continuously for 6 years and 9 months, enough wind would be produced to equal the energy of an atomic bomb.

Bottom line, our society loves the odd, the weird and the ridiculous, which leads us right to the Liqui-Stapler. This is a whimsical gift that is sure to start conversations, beginning with those five all-important words…“where did you get that,” which not coincidentally are the same words my grandfather wants put on his tombstone. This novelty stapler not only works, it uses standard staples and has a liquid filled see-through chamber with a stock globe-floating icon. Who thinks of these things?

Well, I’m off to the Roanoke Miniature Golf Finals, where my cousin hopes to become the youngest back-to-back winner in Virginia history. That’s right, Virginia’s not just for lovers anymore. Until next time, remember, millions saw the apple fall, but Newton was the first one who asked why.