Virgil Winston: Marketing Guru

I’d like to talk to you about U.S. Patent # 174465, also known as the phone, our country’s most prized possession and/or obsession. At any one time, there are 100 million phone conversations taking place in our country, five of which are happening in my house alone, and all of which are on a cell phone that happens to be no more than five feet away from a corded phone. My family—like yours—loves their cell phones. They don’t just flip open and click, they do music, photos, text messaging, videos and Internet. About the only thing they don’t do is put you to bed at night, but then, I guess, that’s what lullaby ring tones are for.

Of course, it’s not just our kids; it’s all of us. We’re all addicted to the cell phone. Be honest…what’s the first thing you do when you get in the car…it’s not turning on the ignition…it’s dialing someone on the phone, right? Now, I’ll spare you my rant on driving with cell phones, but I will offer this one piece of advice: if you’re pulling out of parking spot in the middle of a crowded lot, with a Big Mac in your hand—that is probably not the time to dial your aunt in Slovakia—and my wife knows exactly what I’m talking about.

Sure, we could offer a helping hand to these troubled folks—a twelve-step program to help detox off the cell…or we could be the “friendly pusher” who enables those individuals with the products that will keep them happy…and our company’s name on the top of their minds. I suppose I don’t have to tell you what I’m choosing.

Of course, we’ll have to give them a product they don’t have…and let me tell you, cell phone addicts have everything. Except one. It’s called the Wind-Up Flashlight /Cell Phone Charger. This thing is cool. With three white LED lights and rechargeable batteries inside, this is the cell phone charger you go to in an emergency. And what bigger emergency can you imagine in life than being without your cell phone. It has five cell phone adapters included: Samsung, Nokia, Motorola, Ericcson & LG. It has a push button on/off switch and rubber grips on the side. And one more thing, it has a wind up flashlight to boot, so you can find that lost cell phone in the dark, stopping those inevitable shakes of panic. Like I always say, one country’s obsession is another person’s marketing solution.

Speaking of obsession, I’m off to the couch with my own little addiction called the remote control. Until next time, think about this, “if we love our cell phones so much, how come we hate everyone else’s.”